Goodbye, my dear readers! I’m quitting (or going on a long hiatus, who knows)

This is the moment I knew had to come, but it still hurts. I feel sad and empty, but also a bit relieved. It’s weird, like the end of a relationship which just doesn’t work anymore.

As you read from the title: I’m quitting. Or going on hiatus. I don’t really know.

There are many reasons behind my decision and I want to be completely honest, as I’ve always been for more than 5 years of blogging and sharing my feelings.

First of all: my free time is very limited lately, I’m working a lot, plus the moving and other personal situations made me busy and worried everyday for a month, but it’s not over yet; when I come home, I want to spend time with my husband and my dog, if possible with my family, I have no will or energy to play games.

I won’t lie: I could still somehow find some time to update, but I don’t feel motivated anymore.

Blogs are outdated now, I think they are probably dying, since people prefer to watch streams nowadays; lately, when I sit in front of my computer, trying to plan a schedule for reviews or other content, I end up asking myself often: “do I really want to put efforts in a post that nobody is going to read? When I could spend some time with people who actually care about me, instead?”.

I’ve never written here to make money or to feel popular in the community, I just wanted to share my opinions in a place which could make me proud of myself, built up with passion and love for otome games. This blog helped me to gain confidence, it was like a diary for my sad days, it grew up with me; that’s why it’s almost impossible to let it go.

But at the same time, there were months in the past when it felt like a chore, so I considered to just quit and close it all; I’ve taken short breaks, of a few weeks, then I came back.

Maybe it’s the same now, maybe I’ll come back in summer, excited, ready for new posts… but I don’t really think so; I feel it in my heart, this could probably be my last post forever.

I’m a moody person, everything can happen: maybe tomorrow I’ll wake up in writing mood and I’ll delete this post, pretending it never existed. Maybe I’ll change my mind for random reasons.

I don’t want to disappear completely from the otome community: I’ll keep using twitter, since there are still friends I want to keep in touch with, even if most of them almost disappeared; many people left, or so it seems to me.

I rarely follow back, since I want to keep my TL clean to read my friends’ tweets instead of random strangers (even if I always answer Dms from anyone, I’m not a bad person, I swear), but it feels empty lately, I’m not enjoying myself as the old days.

Maybe I’m too old, or I’ve been into this fandom for too long, but I can’t keep up with the energy of streamers and enthusiastic people, I’m way beyond that phase.

Everything changes, it’s normal.

People care about something or someone at some point, while a few months later they shift their attention somewhere else, and it’s fine.

It took me like 2 weeks to write this post, I didn’t know if I should actually talk about it or just slowly and silently disappear without anyone noticing; but I feel like I need to be honest with all the kind people who supported me through the years, who always had a sweet word of appreciation for me. Thank you and sorry. If I’ll ever come back to blogging, I hope you’ll still be here.

If you want to be friends with me, even if I somehow became a boring old lady, send me Dms on twitter and I’ll gladly reply.

Well, I don’t think there’s more to say, even if it breaks my heart.

I want to call this “hiatus”, even if I’m not actually sure I’ll resume posting one day, but admitting I’m closing this blog hursts too much; who knows, what life has in store for us?

Until that moment, be healthy and happy!