Hello and welcome back to my “let’s talk” series, dedicated to sharing experiences and struggles related to otome games!
Today, I want to write my feelings about quitting this fandom, or at least dropping my blog.
Don’t worry, I don’t want to scare you, I’m not going anywhere! I’m talking in general.
Let’s get back to the very start, more than 7 years ago.
When I discovered the otome game genre, I was so excited, I swear I couldn’t even fall asleep: so many ikemen I could date, they where just waiting for me… I couldn’t even believe it was possible, it was a dream come true!
I’ve had crushes on anime characters before, I watched a lot of shoujo with good looking guys and most of the time I didn’t agree with the heroine’s final choice. Well, my tastes were probably weird even in my teen days. But now, the choice was mine!
As you could expect, when the expectations are so high, reality hits you in the face even harder.
After a few months of blind love, I realized that some games were not “for me”, and good looking boys weren’t enough to keep me interested.
It was just like a relationship between real people: when the infatuation is gone, you start to realize the other person has flaws; that’s when you decide if you should keep it going, or just leave.
I’ve realized that my hobbies usually have a “3 years time span” before I start to get bored and move on: it always happened to me with my previous hobbies, so I expected otome games to follow the same pattern. But this is not related to this topic, maybe I’ll talk about in some other time, if you are curious.
My first “break” from playing otome games happened in summer 2016.
The reason was a chain of boring games, which made me question if the problem was actually mine: you know, when everything around you seems terrible, maybe it’s just how you perceive it.
That was the year I first went to Japan, so my mood went high again immediately as I reached Tokyo and I was able to shopping like crazy!
When I came back, I opened this blog and my love for otome games was again at its peak.
After a few months, I had many issues both at work and private life, so all I could do to feel better was to search for “happiness” in otome games and try to escape the real world.
I devoted all my free time to this hobby, trying to improve my blog; but at some point, I realized I was becoming obsessed with it, my only goal was to become “popular”, as if my own value depended from it. Which obviously, is not healthy.
So I decided to go on a social media break: I went on vacation for 3 weeks without using twitter or my blog at all; I took long walks and spent time just thinking about myself and my future, to find a motivation outside the screen. And it worked a lot.
From that moment, I found a new path in life and otome games became just an hobby again.
Years have passed from those days, I had many up and down moments, but I can’t see myself stopping playing otome games or closing my blog: it’s a huge part of my life, my comfort zone, which I treasure a lot.
Through the years, I think otome games became a part of me: getting excited about new releases, starting a new game, sharing my feelings while I livetweet, writing and posting a new review here… is a part of my life. Maybe it will slow down in the future, as I grow older and priorities change; it will also depend on the community, if it becomes a better or a worse place to be.
But for now, I can assure you that this place won’t disappear soon. I hope this will make someone happy, that would be worth any effort!
So, to answer the question of this post: yes, I thought about dropping otome games about twice; and yes, I thought about dropping this blog a few times, when I was feeling too obsessed about stats and I wasn’t getting the results I wanted.
But it’s ok now, so don’t worry! We still have a long path ahead, made of masterpieces, kusoge, cries, laughters……. and I’ll share it all with you!
And what about you? Have you ever thought about dropping otome games?
If you have topics you want me to talk about, just ask and I’ll write about it!